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I think I chose you. I think I chose you when I was simply a floating star, waiting for a place to land. I chose you in your torture, in your spiral of doubt, in your selfishness. I chose you in your hands, in their warmth and in the way they would glide across the page leaving a universe in their wake.

I think I chose you from high above, when I was deciding where I would walk in life. I think I chose you for the things I saw in you. Things you never saw. Things you died quietly, never knowing. I chose you to become more compassionate, more caring, more connected. I chose you not because you could show me these things, but because you needed them, too.

I chose you and watched. I watched and learned and lost you. You chose and evaded and left me. But I refuse to believe that I chose wrong.

I am missing you today and I would choose you again.

Love,

Your Daughter

This entry was posted on Wednesday, February 15th, 2012 at 10:55 pm and is filed under dad. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

13 Responses to “”

  1. Jett Says:
    February 15th, 2012 at 11:10 pm

    We had a terrible day here.
    I get this, I get all this.
    I don’t know if I chose him, but I know I’m supposed to be his and he mine and it didn’t take the cancer eating him for me to know it.

    You are beautiful, and I’m sorry you are having to do without, having to miss.

  2. Jocelyn Says:
    February 15th, 2012 at 11:22 pm

    That you would choose him again says everything.

  3. Kim Says:
    February 16th, 2012 at 7:18 am

    I cannot explain how much I needed to see this right now. Thank you.

    And I am so sorry.

  4. JCK (Motherscribe) Says:
    February 16th, 2012 at 7:18 am

    Exquisite as always. What a beautiful piece to read early this morning. Poetry to feast on…

  5. Chibi Jeebs Says:
    February 16th, 2012 at 11:39 am

    Love you, dear heart. <3

  6. Sybil Law Says:
    February 16th, 2012 at 4:00 pm

    Love this.
    xoxo

  7. Kyla Says:
    February 16th, 2012 at 6:54 pm

    Beautiful, Flutter.

  8. sarah piazza Says:
    February 18th, 2012 at 10:09 am

    Oh, God. There goes my heart.

    If anyone is able to choose, my love, it would be you.

  9. krista Says:
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:24 pm

    what a gift. to yourself. to him. and to the others wondering ‘why?’
    beautiful.

  10. krista Says:
    February 20th, 2012 at 12:25 pm

    (oh, and i meant the ‘why?’ in relation to themselves…not to you. hope that was clear.)

  11. TwoBusy Says:
    February 21st, 2012 at 11:52 am

    Oh, mercy.

  12. heidi Says:
    March 19th, 2012 at 8:52 pm

    Oh, my heart. This is, you are so beautiful.

  13. Brian Says:
    March 23rd, 2012 at 4:00 pm

    This is . . . well. I am speechless.

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