In love
Who says this growth is glorious? Who says it will forever change my life? Am I truly straying from what is intuitive, to what is counter?
Or do I drift helplessly, painted less breathtaking than Ophelia? With her beautiful robes on the still river, taking on water as she did. With flowers decorating the elegant unraveling of her mind, petal by petal floating away. Taking bits of her truth with them. Watching in all ways, a sane piece locked in many chambers of distortion, knowing fully her life and sanity were drifting along. Repeating her mantra in a quiet, hushed voice. A prayer, a credo.
Doubt thou the stars are fire;
Doubt that the sun doth move;
Doubt truth to be a liar;
But never doubt I love.
And I do, I love. So open as I am fearful of being, I stand exposed and quaking in love. As vulnerable and strong and tough and paper thin, in love. These shared things, these things kept, these secrets guarded, these secrets exposed. I chip away the hasty mortar, hoping that when the tower falls, my pieces are collected with gentle care, in love.
Painting: Millais
Sonnet: Shakespeare
November 3rd, 2008 at 12:12 am
That painting is fucking glorious. As are you. You’ve only begun to shine…
I’m going to research Millais.
November 3rd, 2008 at 5:22 am
Again, you are an inspiration. You are inspired, and you inspire. Your beauty resounds.
November 3rd, 2008 at 5:34 am
I left you a little present on my blog.
November 3rd, 2008 at 6:17 am
I chip away the hasty mortar
I love this line so.
November 3rd, 2008 at 8:32 am
I get you. Completely.
~*
November 3rd, 2008 at 8:34 am
I love the comparison.
November 3rd, 2008 at 8:56 am
I adore this painting of Ophelia, the Pre-Raphaelites are some of my favourites. Ironically, I just saw Hamlet in production on Saturday.
November 3rd, 2008 at 9:09 am
you know what? i just realized i also don’t trust myself about the intuitive/counter intuitive…..
November 3rd, 2008 at 10:15 am
I love that you love… despite how you hurt. I think that’s what gives me the biggest amount of hope that you’ll going to be Ok because no matter what taken away from you, the ability to love wasn’t.
November 3rd, 2008 at 1:09 pm
love is a fiercely aggressive little bastard, isn’t it? i liken it to a weed, growing in the most unhospitable of places.
look at all the chemicals produced to kill weeds. ever wonder what the world would look like if we just let them grow?
i think it would look beautiful.
i think it would look like love.
one of my dreams is to one day have a garden full of nothing but weeds.
and to watch them grow despite the fight against them.
November 3rd, 2008 at 1:15 pm
Me thinks the tower will fall only when you are ready for the pieces, my friend. And I agree, growth is painful.
November 3rd, 2008 at 3:19 pm
As one who is avoiding growth right now, because of the discomfit that comes with it, I read this and nodded in acquiescence.
November 3rd, 2008 at 4:09 pm
I love that painting.
November 3rd, 2008 at 5:15 pm
First off, I love that painting. Love can be such a difficult one, wishing you all the best from it!
November 3rd, 2008 at 5:32 pm
Ophelia always makes me so sad, as fragile and delicate a flower as she is, so helpless to control her emotions. You, my dear, are made of much tougher stuff.
November 3rd, 2008 at 5:49 pm
We had that picture up in my house when I was a child…my mother always had the most beautiful art. I found myself going back to that picture again and again as a young one, always finding something beautiful in it…Love.
November 3rd, 2008 at 7:04 pm
I’ve always thought that painting was exquisite and also very frightening. But so is life, isn’t it?
November 3rd, 2008 at 8:25 pm
As an English teacher, I love this painting. It is a cautionary beauty . . . deceptive in its serenity.
As a woman, I am drawn to you words and the wisdom with which they are shaped. You pulled something out of the image, out of yourself.
Glorious. Really . . .
November 3rd, 2008 at 9:21 pm
Beautiful flutter…I immediately thought of this song when I read this post.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yldJ2XAZYNE
November 4th, 2008 at 5:54 am
That painting is one of my favorites. Love is scary, but necessary. Truly.
November 4th, 2008 at 12:25 pm
This makes me so happy Flutter. And that painting is gorge.
November 4th, 2008 at 2:56 pm
Wow. Your writing is just breathtaking! Incredibly powerful imagery.
November 4th, 2008 at 7:09 pm
Gorgeous, all of it.
November 4th, 2008 at 8:18 pm
That you can love–and admit it publicly–is the greatest sign of your health and strength and power.
November 4th, 2008 at 8:48 pm
You are not an Ophelia. You are made of stronger stuff.
November 6th, 2008 at 11:14 am
I love that picture – Millais rocks.
Growth isn’t constant – sometimes you have to drift to know where to go next. I know you will emerge from this stasis and the way will be clear.
Pfft! Listen to me – like I have a damn shred of patience to talk about!
Hang in there babe…