commencement
In my interview with Danielle over at Knotty Yarn, she asked me an interesting question involving a theme that she noticed in my writing. She called my blog a poem to my 17 year old self. I’d never considered what I’ve written here in that capacity. But, as a body of work, I can see how it easily and seamlessly falls right into that description. I wrote myself a letter in that interview, which has been churning around in my mind as incomplete.
I view my life in two very distinct chapters. Before my rape and after. But lately, it feels as though a third, unfamiliar chapter is beginning to take shape. It is begging for my attention. Pulling, pushing, challenging. It seems to be demanding that I graduate from this long-fought period of pain and emerge into my birthright. Below is the commencement speech to the girl I am becoming.
Go, with passion. Ever forward progressing with the fire of things which bring you joy, go. In the morning, after your blackest dreams, leave them waiting and fight them again later, with your sleeping mind. They have no place in your waking life, go.
Go, with boldness. You are a shining creature of light. Hiding it serves you no purpose and denies those around you the opportunity to soak up your glow, go. Write your words and sing your songs. Paint your world with your own perspective. Your brushstrokes are a living legacy to more than just your survival. They are a sequined walkway to your success, go.
Go, attack those things you think you cannot do with the same fearlessness you attack the things you know you can do. Your only failure is when you are too afraid to go. Go.
Go, love with the fullness of your heart and count on it to be broken. But dance, in the glory of love for whatever time it lasts. When you find it in its permanence, prepare for it not to be easy. But rather to be worth it. So know that you will carry battle scars, but you are a warrior. Go.
Go with confidence. Your past is not your future and is merely a shadow in your present. It is left to you to forgive. Forgiveness is not for the one who is wrong. It is for the peace of the one who is right. Act with mercy, go.
There are absolutes. There are grays. There is a world of absolute balance and chaos. It is not for you to fix, or even understand. It is for you to navigate with grace, with humility. With kindness. You are all of these things and more that are yet to be named, go.
December 18th, 2009 at 12:51 pm
You are a wonderful shining beautiful strong person. I love the theme of “Go!” It’s yours.
You go girl.
December 18th, 2009 at 1:12 pm
This is the first commencement speech to hold my attention from beginning to end. If only they could have all been this poignant.
*stands to applaud*
December 18th, 2009 at 1:12 pm
Green lights ahead, as far as the eye can see!
xo, Mango
December 18th, 2009 at 1:30 pm
oh, this is so beautiful and powerful. thank you. gorgeous, gorgeous.
go.
December 18th, 2009 at 2:09 pm
I’ve been hoping that your lack of writing here meant that you didn’t NEED to write here. I think that might be true. xo
December 18th, 2009 at 2:31 pm
Beautiful. I was thinking about everything that I’ve been through in my life. And without even being able to recall the micro of things…just the biggest things I can remember, I paused to think that if my younger self had a bit of inkling about what was ahead…she may have sat plump in the middle of the path and not even moved. I know because of everything I have developed so much in myself…but I am so very happy to have been as naive as I have been…cause? Phew!
December 18th, 2009 at 2:45 pm
I think we all saw this commencement before you did. Go for it.
December 18th, 2009 at 3:41 pm
Lovely for any girl of any age.
Go, go, GO!
Or, come here. So I can give you a big hug and kiss!
December 18th, 2009 at 3:43 pm
Yes, go. This is beautiful, and so are you.
December 18th, 2009 at 6:30 pm
You know what I want you to do…go…:)
December 18th, 2009 at 7:18 pm
It is my hope that we all can (and will) Go!
December 18th, 2009 at 7:45 pm
You are a shining creature of light. Yes, you are.
December 18th, 2009 at 9:11 pm
go.
girl.
go.
December 18th, 2009 at 9:33 pm
Beautiful. I particularly love “sequined walkway”.
Go.
December 18th, 2009 at 9:55 pm
Nice, very nice Miss Flutter.
Now go.
December 18th, 2009 at 10:56 pm
Heart-stoppingly lovely. Go.
December 19th, 2009 at 1:36 am
Your past is not your future and is merely a shadow in your present. It is left to you to forgive. Forgiveness is not for the one who is wrong. It is for the peace of the one who is right. Act with mercy, go.
Christine, this one statement … well … what can I say? You write in a way that makes it possible to believe in healing … real honest to goodness healing that takes everything into account but still lets you go. Go.
xx Jos
December 19th, 2009 at 6:16 am
i love the idea of writing a speech to yourself. we should try more often to articulate things to ourselves in the way we do to other people. and this is a wonderful, uplifting speech. you deserve to live life fearlessly and well.
December 19th, 2009 at 7:12 am
i heart you.
December 19th, 2009 at 7:20 am
yes, do. and keep on.
December 19th, 2009 at 8:13 am
This blows me away. I think this is such a great and healing thing to write for yourself – and probably something everyone could benefit from doing.
Thanks for sharing it, it really gives me something to think about….
December 19th, 2009 at 8:20 am
You go girl.
December 19th, 2009 at 10:12 am
Oh, Christine, this makes me feel all tingly.
I particularly love this message:
“Go, attack those things you think you cannot do with the same fearlessness you attack the things you know you can do. Your only failure is when you are too afraid to go. Go.”
That is advice so many of us need to take to heart.
You are amazing.
December 19th, 2009 at 6:53 pm
I love you. This is gorgeous.
December 19th, 2009 at 6:58 pm
What a moving letter to the you of your present, as you look forward to your future and all the great things it holds.
December 19th, 2009 at 8:48 pm
I love the warrior goddess erupting through these words. Indeed go, C.
December 20th, 2009 at 10:07 am
You go and dance down that sequinned path, you beautiful girl.
December 20th, 2009 at 6:23 pm
Absolutely stunning.
I wish I wrote with half the honesty you do.
Just stunning.
December 20th, 2009 at 10:49 pm
I’ve been waiting for a new beginning to write itself across your page. This is powerful, possible and potentially Earth-shattering. Aller.
December 21st, 2009 at 6:07 pm
“Act with mercy, go.” This is all so beautiful…as are you.
December 22nd, 2009 at 1:08 pm
What a joy, to watch you blossom into love.
December 23rd, 2009 at 6:38 am
You make me so proud, friend.
December 23rd, 2009 at 12:22 pm
Go.
xoxoxoxo
December 25th, 2009 at 6:35 am
Hard to say this without sounding like a cliche but … you are an inspiration.
December 25th, 2009 at 7:36 am
MERRY CHRISTMAS to you! Have a wonderful new year too!
December 25th, 2009 at 4:42 pm
Go, indeed … but I think you’ve been moving in that direction all along.
Merry Christmas.
December 26th, 2009 at 10:44 am
you leave me speechless. i too feel a new chapter approaching. i will take your words with me as i run to meet it.
love you my sister and deeply grateful to feel your glow.
December 27th, 2009 at 7:57 am
I just talk to myself. They’re about the only interesting conversations I ever have . . .
December 28th, 2009 at 12:09 pm
Happy New Beginnings!! What a lovely commencement speech, you go girl!!
December 28th, 2009 at 3:07 pm
that’s it. I am coming over there to HUG YOU.
xxxx
December 28th, 2009 at 3:07 pm
my little baby’s all grown up. sniff. sniff.
January 7th, 2010 at 11:13 am
Hey i just received a alert from my firewall when i opened your page do you know why this occured? Could it possibly from your advertising or something? Thanks, really odd i hope it was harmless?
January 11th, 2010 at 5:32 pm
Beautiful. Powerful, I think, to have out visibly for you to look at frequently. Maybe printed out by your bed?
January 12th, 2010 at 12:02 pm
I needed to read this. Today. Thank you.